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About a week ago, I sent out an email to just about everyone in my address book that didn't live in Washington. The email outlined my new contact info for both home and work and that's about it. Well, some people didn't seem to appreciate this information:

From lwashnoc@yahoo.com

Date: Mon, 6 Oct 2003 18:04:05 -0700 (PDT)

From: Laura Washnock-DiPietro

To: mbibik AT umich DOT edu


I want you to stay completely out of my life, that is, after all, why I broke up with you. This means that I do not want to hear from you and I do not want you contacting, in any way, my friends and family. Trust me, they do not want to hear from you either. I did not email you earlier because I did not want to talk to you. I don't care about your new address and phone number. I don't care about your new job. In short, I don't care about what you are doing with your life. I also do not care for you to know what is going on in my life.

If you are looking for closure, here it is. I broke up with you because you made me miserable. You were emotionally abusive and controlling. You put me down and made me feel stupid for being myself. When I broke up with you, I was too afraid of you to be this direct. I am not anymore and I am sick of you trying to weasel your way back into my life. Leave my friends alone. Leave my family alone. Leave me alone.


Seeing as how a regular reply might not be appreciated either and I always need to get the last word in, here is my open letter of reply:


First off, relax. We have not talked since the beginning of this year. I sent two emails over that period of time inquiring about your well-being. I love how that is considered me trying to weasel my way back into your life! I send an email to everyone in my address book about my new contact info and this is the reply that I get? That is just a bit dramatic!

Twice you mentioned leaving your family and friends alone. I can only assume that you brought this up because they received the same contact info email as you did. Had I known that would upset them so much, I definitely would have reconsidered sending it to them! Sarcasm aside, I will not trust you when you say they don't want to hear from me. A few of your friends didn't like me while we were together and I'm sure a few more switched sides when you broke up with me. I do know that certain people, including at least one sibling of yours, think differently. You may have requested that they all shun me but that cannot affect their true feelings. Who is being the controlling one now? It's a shame that you cannot trust them to make their own decisions.

I made you feel stupid? I'm sorry; I must have acted as a mirror of some sort, allowing you to see yourself for who you truly are. It does not take much for someone whose only intellectual hobby is to watch VH1 for hours on end to think of themselves as being stupid. Try reading a book. Better yet, try challenging yourself! Outside of your required courses, did you take anything difficult in college? I know you didn't make it into the honors program, but there are some difficult classes offered to the rest of the school as well.

So, you broke up with me so that I would stay completely out of your life? Is that how it works? Why is it that so many other people have the ability to break up and at least be cordial? Actually, if I remember correctly, you have no contact whatsoever with any of your exes. Why is that? Do you understand how to forgive people? Are your emotional abilities so black-and-white that once you break up with someone, all emotion toward them must turn to hate? Do you even understand how to separate the concepts of friend and significant other? Hopefully you will learn with Alex. Hey, he was one of my good friends back in elementary school. He was probably one of the main reasons why we broke up and still I do not hate him. Forgive and forget.

Here is my take on the situation as a whole. You met Alex while we were together and while our relationship was having problems. Having a small shred of morality, you knew that you couldn't cheat so you decided to break up with me to be with him. Though we did have problems, there was still some good in the relationship. While you were with Alex, you had to channel that emotional energy somewhere. The easiest emotion to channel into is hate, so there it went! It is much easier to hate someone with support from people you are close to so you slandered me enough to gain this support. When you saw my latest email, you felt a slight twinge of interest but you had to kill it. Instead of forgiving and forgetting, you redirected that twinge into the anger spewed forth in your email. For that emotional outburst, I applaud you.

Even if I am completely wrong, know that you have now proved yourself as the paragon of emotional puerility you were destined to become.