Any idiot can drive fast in a straight line

Saturday, September 23, 2000

How random! Modern Humorist is a fairly funny site which I have only just discovered. Just like The Onion did awhile back, they have mentioned my hometown of Livonia, Michigan. It's buried near the bottom, so keep reading. That place is a strip mall of 100,000 people, 98% of which are white. The city is not worthy of mention.

Here it is, 9:15 AM or so. If I was going to see Phish this weekend, I would have left by now. You can just hear my spirits deflate.

Thursday, September 21, 2000

Whoa, I just realized that I am going to Chicago for the weekend. This has been planned since my birthday (August 4th -- don't forget next year!) when I got the tickets to Phish, but I almost completely forgot. It will be a fun fun weekend, believe me.

Monday, September 18, 2000

Star Wars Gangsta Rap.

Sunday, September 17, 2000

I am not upset that I weigh 190lbs. I am upset that this is the first time in my adult life that my weight is greater than my IQ and my bench press.

Perhaps the film I'm looking most forward to next year is DUDE, WHERE's MY CAR who's plot outline simply states, "Two potheads wake up from a night of partying and can't remember where they parked their car. With Fabio as a guest star, and characters like "Nordic Dude #2" in the credits, it's cleary next year's blockbuster. Stolen, again, from X-E.

Christopher Reeve broke his leg on August 17th during physical therapy. The exact cause of the injury is unknown, but sources close to Reeve suggest it may have something to do with trying to get a crippled guy to walk. Stolen from X-E.

The Smashing Pumpkins are on their way out, but in a great way. Sick of their record label, they decided to allow the entire album to be available on MP3. That is not a link to a news story, that is a link to the MP3s themselves!