Any idiot can drive fast in a straight line

Friday, July 26, 2002

Firebird with the Mad Max package.

Stealth with the Tina Turner package.

The first five links for "thesaurus rock" all point to Bad Religion pages.

Mmm, Hot Snakes... Anybody that can pull off using the word dilettante in a rock song is golden in my book.

I added a search box and an archive box to the navigation (currently) on the left of the page. Tell me if there are any issues, especially with the archive box. It is using CSS2 to handle the overflow of archive links.

Thursday, July 25, 2002

One of my coworkers is really into home automation. He showed me how his entire house is controllable through the web. It even keeps logs of all the activity. A lot of geeks are worried about the uptime of their servers. His house has a whole list of uptimes such as "Living Room Lamp 1, In the OFF state for 1 day, 13 hours, 5 minutes and 36 seconds". He can tell when the garage door is open, who has called and how long they talked, the temperature of each room, etc etc. He uses HomeSeer software and a lot of products from You know those damned X10 pop-under ads? Well, it turns out that X10 is actually a protocol for home automation and that no one that does home automation really buys from the official X10 company.

Back to that "entire house is controllable through the web" bit: Combine an always-on DSL connection and a weak password, and someone can hack your house. Tip: don't use your first name as your username with a single repeating character as your password.

Tuesday, July 23, 2002

C a n t b r e a k t h r e e - q u a r t e r m i l l i o n m a r k . . .

An informal analysis of my main email account: For July 22nd, 2002, out of 74 emails total, 37 emails were spam, 37 emails were not. *50%* spam. But it's okay. Thank you, SpamAssassin.

Ah, Collapse, my heart goes out to thee, and my score of 736,778.

Monday, July 22, 2002

<helminthes> and the little basket at the counter says tips, so you hock a big loogie in it and then you realize what you did and say, "oh shit i'm dyslexic"

<adam1> my gf supposedly has "issues" with me
<Hiroe> Heh, my ex didn't have just a few issues, she had a fuckin *Subscription*

So, I get home from work a bit late today, 5 PM to be more exact. As I pull into my parking lot, I hear a cacophony of high pitched squeals and beeps. Annoyed though intrigued, the sounds seemed familiar. As I get closer to my apartment door, I realize almost simultaneously that the sound is coming from my apartment and is the sound of six smoke detectors going off at once. Can someone cautiously bust into an apartment? I did just that. No smoke. IRON ON AN IRONING BOARD! But it was cool and non-burning. RUN UPSTAIRS. Nothing. W h a t t h e h e l l . . .

The usual way to get the damned smoke detectors is to find the one that is being set off and then flagellate a large cloth object (usually a bath towel) in its general direction. No smoke means no amount of flagellating will help. By this point, I am almost completely deaf. The sound is so much, I cannot even tell where it is coming from any more. All of the detectors are on the same circuit, so I started disconnecting them one by one. Being just under 6 foot tall, the detectors were *just* out of my reach to be grabbed down and disconnected. Damn it all, I just started ripping them down cautiously (again, if possible). I got 5 of them (the sixth was already disconnected) but the sound continued! I was so deaf that I couldn't tell if the ones I had just removed and tossed to the floor were still sounding or if there was a hidden detector, or if the sound was all in my head. After an eternity of going nuts, the detectors timed out and the silence was deafening.

None of my roommates were home, there was no smoke, it made no sense. Thinking of how great my luck is, I knew that if I left all of the detectors disconnected there *would* be a fire. Replaced the two downstairs: no problem. Replaced the one in the upstairs hall: no problem. Replaced the ones in the other bedrooms: no problem. Replace the one in my bedroom: FUCKING DEAFENING CACOPHONY GETS REVENGE. You know that little confused path that people comicly take when they don't know where to go or what to do? You know, rush off in one direction, quickly reverse, spin around in a circle then just charge forward? I did just that, in my own room, in my own apartment. Ripped down the detector in my room and the sound stopped.

All of this chaos because a single smoke detector isn't working properly. I still can't hear right.

Collapse, I loth and abhor thee! Why must Roger torment me with his high score of 236,110? My 233,077 seems so pathetic in comparison.

<Crazy Waiter Story>
So, after Chris' amateur martial arts fight in Rochester Hills on Saturday, we all went to Red Robin in Novi. We knew our waiter had lost it when our first impression of him was seeing him dance to YMCA with extreme fervor. Over the course of the night, he asked us if we had ever been to Philadelpia (all because the Rocky theme song was being played), asked us if we liked the Shining (all because of a picture of Jack Nicholson with glowing eyes), explained the entire story of the Shining (even though we all knew it), forgot Lauras drink, forgot Lauras food, then gave us an extra pitcher of beer to make up for his insanity. His excuse was that he had been working since 10 AM (and it was already midnight). My reasoning states that he is always like that in a ploy to get better tips.
</Crazy Waiter Story>